Just a quick note today. I do believe we are aiming for an April release. By that, I did not mean that the people who have me chained in the basement are planning to unleash me in April to wreak havoc in the streets (though that sounds like fun, too). I meant, of course, the release of Death Rejoices, the second book in the Marnie Baranuik series. Now, I know we’re all very excited, but do try to control yourselves…

<Mmmnnyeah, don’t do that>

This is crunch-time, people, so if you see me wandering the streets in my pajamas, talking to myself exclusively in foreign swear words, pulling on my hair, and trying to take down full-grown trees with my teeth, just duck behind a big shrub until I’ve passed by and you should be perfectly safe.

Side note: I recently downloaded a Magic 8 Ball app for my phone, and am now letting it make all my decisions. I don’t believe in plastic prognostications, except that I totally do. But no. Yeah. So, let’s try it out. FOR SCIENCE!

Me: Should I go for a walk? *poke*

Magic 8 Ball: Cannot Predict Now.

Me: Okay, so maybe later. Should I read a book in a bubble bath with some chocolate and a glass of wine?

Magic 8 Ball: Outlook not so good.

Me: What–why? Am I gonna drown in the tub?

Magic 8 Ball: Without a doubt.

Me: Uh, I think I know how to take a bath without accidentally killing myself?

Magic 8 Ball: Don’t count on it.

Me: Magic 8 Ball, are you a piece of shit?

Magic 8 Ball: Very doubtful.

Me: Am *I* a piece of shit?

Magic 8 Ball: It is decidedly so.

Me: OH YEAH? *poke!*

Magic 8 Ball: Ask again later.

Me: I said, OH YEAH?? *jab jab jab!* Think you’re so much smarter than me, huh?? *JAB!*

Magic 8 Ball: You may rely on it.

So, obviously this thing is way-way wrong. *checks it* I mean, in all the ways, all wrong. *checks it again* Clearly, I shouldn’t even ask it. *checks again* Stupid broken ball.

(author’s note: This is my I’m-Getting-Super-Serious-With-The-Things face. No? Not so much? Okay, it’s my Fetch-My-Cookie-Or-Else-I’ll-Write-You-A-Sternly-Worded-Letter face. Totally scary, right?)