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Tag Archives: writing

Kicking Your Own Ass (Then Sending Me A Picture)

Step One: Beg, Borrow, Steal You: “I’ve always wanted to write a book.” Me: “And you haven’t because ….?” If your answer to me sounds anything like I have no time or Everyone needs me or I’m so busy beheading these damn squirrels, I will put you in a headlock. BUT I’ll do it with love–probably I’ll even give you a little cheek-to-boobie time (everyone likes that)–because I feel your pain. Writing does require time, that can’t be argued. Words don’t fly …

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Fear & Collaboration in Joytown

I have some bad news, folks: the sun is shining again. That’s right! Hundreds of birds are making their flippity-fluttery return-to-roost commotion, complete with peeps and caws and squawks (with their full-on assault of Cute, how dare they?). Fragrant grape hyacinths are blooming en masse next to my front steps (a creeping, sentient army of evil flora; mark my words, they’re not as innocent as they look). Their scent is putting an extra zip in my step. They’re making me happy, dammit. And that’s a …

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Hiking the Horror Best Seller List

This morning, my friend Dax pointed out that Touched is #7 on Amazon’s horror best seller list. WOOT! “Feel pride” was not first on my To Do list today … “be an irksome twat” was. I feel so unprepared. After I regained consciousness, I couldn’t help but wonder what my main characters would say to their author about this climb. Marnie: Apparently, people love dingbats, dick jokes and general assholery. Who knew? Batten:  My faith in humanity just took a major ass-reaming. Marnie: We …

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Your Mission, Should You Choose To Accept It (And Probably, You Shouldn’t)…

Well, it’s been a year of blogs from yours truly, and what have we covered? What haven’t we covered? We talked about how Hemingway’s ghost is almost certainly trying to plonk me with coconuts. We talked about the “joys” of artistic temperment (also known as an eight ball of insecurity, insanity & desperation), grey hairs, forehead wrinkles–I swear, some days I look old enough to be my own mother–battling the various seasons of distraction, stalking your characters, stalking yourself and occassionally others (ie. my eye …

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