Talking oneself up and promoting one’s own work is an integral part of being an Indie author. From what I hear, it’s usually a necessity when you’re a traditonally published midlister too, so I don’t mind having to do some footwork, here. Gotta pay my dues, climb the tough roads, shuck the corn and shovel the horseshit. I’m slowly coming around to the business side of publishing, including marketing and advertising. Gotta admit, not my favourite thing, and it isn’t going to sound like me, but here goes. AJ does Self Promo. *ahem*

“Hey guys, I wrote this coolio horror novel called Touched, and I’m launching it on Tuesday September 20th on Amazon.com. You should totally check it out if you like coolio horror novels, but maybe you only read fancy smart literary works, with, like, brainy parts and learning and stuff, and not so much guns, gaffs and ghoul sludge, so yeah, never mind. ”

Actually, that did sound a lot like me. But probably it won’t work terribly well. Lemme try again.

“Hey guys, check out my awesome–“*urgl-burgle, gak!* As I feared. Self-promotion makes me go into Murloc mode.

Can’t do it yet. Not good at it. Trying. It sounds so, I dunno, confident? Those of you who  know me, know that ain’t me. That’s probably the reason I sit in my darkened room writing books in the first place; if I were self-confident, I’d be out chasing a bright, loud, public sorta career/life. You know, one of those lives where you see other humans and, uh, sunlight?

To me, when I sound confident, I feel stuck up.  Like I should be sitting steel-pole straight in an iron chair on a sunny cafe patio drinking a half caf soy vanilla latte with my pinkie stuck in the air almost as high as my nose, smoothing the pearl buttons on my french silk dress … not slumped braless in my dingy khaki M*A*S*H t-shirt with the hole in the left armpit, spooning Nestle’s hot chocolate powder directly into my gaping maw, do not pass mug, do not collect boiling water  (author’s note: can we pretend I’m not doing that?).

This is more my style: “Hey guys, check out this imbecilic thing I did/said/wrote and then join me–won’t you?– in crawling under my bed to self-loathingly scarf a whole bag of Cool Ranch Doritos then weep openly into the empty bag.” (obviously, this is a wild exageration–I usually start sobbing long before the bag is empty)

Sadly, my style is not going to sell my book. Therefore … *sucks wind* …. one more think-I-can attempt.

Today, tomorrow and Monday I will be posting excerpts from Touched, both here on my blog and via Twitter’s #novelines hashtag. If you like them, you might like my book, and I invite you to grab it on Amazon on Tuesday if you have one of those nifty new-fangled Kindle do-dads, or the Kindle app on your iPad, iPhone or laptop. I will be launching the eBook on Kobo, Smashwords and the Nook as well (dates to be announced) and the print proofs for my paper launch should be here this week for me to peruse (pictures of me lewdly molesting said proofs to be shredded immediately upon sobering-up).

The book signing for the print launch is tentatively set for Friday October 28th and Saturday October 29th at Chapters St. Catharines in the Fairview Mall, so if you miss me Friday night, you can catch me Saturday afternoon. Books will hit the shelves about a week prior in case anyone wants to get their hands on a copy before the signing, to read it before seeing me, or to ensure you get a copy. It’s coming out in trade paper format, and hard covers will also be available but in limited quantities, so let me know if you want one reserved. If any of this changes, and as the specific times of the signings become available, I shall post immediately here and Facebook/Twitter. 

*whew* That wasn’t too-too hard. I might have only popped three grey hairs there, and the vein throbbing alongside my right temple will probably go back to normal in an hour or so. *checks Nestle can with a dry cough* I started with a full can, and I can’t tell how much there is left, cuz it’s negligible. But I burnt about 8 kajillion calories in pure anxious energy, so that’s gotta even out right?

(editor’s note: please keep this image of AJ Aalto firmly in your mind. If her mental status of late is any indication of things to come, then this is probably the last time you’ll see sane & sober. Luckily, the book signing is near Halloween, and we can pretend the straight jacket is part of her costume! YAY!)