{"id":695,"date":"2011-05-26T19:01:37","date_gmt":"2011-05-27T00:01:37","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/?p=695"},"modified":"2011-05-26T19:01:37","modified_gmt":"2011-05-27T00:01:37","slug":"harvesting-the-best-brains-and-junk","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/?p=695","title":{"rendered":"Harvesting the Best Brains (And Junk)"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

A writer’s greatest resource, in my opinion, is the\u00a0awesome\u00a0clout of human brain power–millions of furiously-blinking electric impulses zinging along nerves and neurons, dancing in a heady soup (heh, I said head<\/em>) of hormones, fed precise doses of\u00a0cerebral chemicals of near-magical influence, apt to spill glory in a blink, surging with readiness like a cock at a strip club. I do not refer now to the writer’s own brain, no. I’m talking about the collected pool of\u00a0human knowledge and behaviour available to the writer through connecting with\u00a0other people. Watch. Listen. Ask questions.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>Writers are, as a species,\u00a0first-class listeners and observers. In a crowd, you will find a writer sitting back, silently training their phenomenal focus and attention on\u00a0other humans, as though\u00a0the gathering\u00a0were an interesting zoo exhibit, noting behavioural quirks, body language (our<\/em> stare is not in any way\u00a0lascivious, she lied smoothly<\/em>), actions and reactions, picking up dialogue (also known as\u00a0eavesdropping<\/em>). Watch. Listen. Ask questions. That guy over there scribbling on his napkin? Unless he’s taking down the phone number of some hot chick he just met, he’s a writer, and he just noticed how you clandestinely\u00a0wriggle-scratch<\/em>ed your junk; likely he’s trying to come up with a better term for it than wriggle-scratch,<\/em> and wondering if you’ve got crabs.<\/em><\/p>\n

Many writers–like yours truly–are far less comfortable being noticed, than noticing. The VERY<\/em> best information cannot be learned in a book, or school, or online course. The VERY<\/em> best information\u00a0is harvested from\u00a0people, and once you’ve tapped those closest to you, you’re left with strangers: educated strangers, street-smart strangers …\u00a0dangerous strangers?<\/p>\n

Yep, I went there. You know I’m right. Some of the most terrifying criminals are\u00a0scary for the simple fact that they’re clever and resourceful.\u00a0All those\u00a0little grey cells, zinging with incredible versatility,\u00a0may be flipped over to take-or-be-taken<\/em>\u00a0by circumstance or biology … yet\u00a0the fact remains, they have plenty to teach as well, if you’re brave enough. Watch. Listen. Ask questions.\u00a0<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>As a horror writer, I have no choice in that matter. I go where the subject matter leads me. In the past, this has lead me to some dark corners of the human psyche, where morality lines are a\u00a0little (or a lot<\/em>) blurry. I cannot afford to flinch or turn away. The best research is complete immersion, but when the subject\u00a0pool gets too murky to plunge head-first, one must be prudent. Watch. Listen. Ask questions. I’ve watched some pretty horrible shit–things\u00a0I wish\u00a0I could un-see, pictures that made me reach for the brain bleach. Having read all I can get my hands on, in books and online, all that remains is to explore the predatory mind up close and personal. Ask questions (blerg<\/em>). The way\u00a0I see it, a close encounter can only benefit my knowledge pool, and I will not shrink away from it when it presents itself, which (if I’m real lucky and all goes as planned<\/em>)\u00a0should be any day now. My toes curl with nervous anticipation.<\/p>\n

Until then, I seek to overcome my shy demeanor by\u00a0seeking\u00a0out new\u00a0minds to question,\u00a0forcing myself to not only watch\/listen from afar but to reach out to them. That’s my challenge, as an introvert.\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u00a0To that end, there are\u00a0a myriad of\u00a0suitable places to do this. \u00a0I think\u00a0an ideal\u00a0place in the region to\u00a0watch\/listen\/ask questions of\u00a0men in particular–although the female reactions in this place\u00a0are also noteworthy–is a little place called Peppermints in Niagara Falls, Ontario. Peppermints is a strip club featuring male exotic dancers. Who (because this is Canada, and we Canadians are raging pervs<\/em>)\u00a0take it all off. All of it.<\/p>\n

All. Nude. Male.\u00a0Revue. *happy sigh*<\/p>\n

Those are four very nice words. As a writer, I approve of those four words. Big check mark of approval, right here,\u00a0in the air. They’re poetry, in fact, when placed side by side like that. Aren’t they lovely, girls?\u00a0 And like I said before: as a\u00a0writer, I’ll just be\u00a0noting behavioural quirks (right<\/em>) body language (uh hunh<\/em>), actions and reactions (suuure I will<\/em>). Hey, I might be required to do more than watch.\u00a0I mean:\u00a0maybe I’ll\u00a0listen! To some heavy-on-the-bass heart-thudding music (nice save). <\/em>Maybe I’ll harvest the company of one of these flexible athletic fellas and\u00a0“ask\u00a0questions”. Professional questions that could, somehow, sorta, maybe have something to do with a story. Cool, calm, intelligent questions, posed in a “writerly fashion”. I’m pretty sure\u00a0that “writerly fashion” means no drool. I can\u00a0manage that. (Riiiiight.)<\/em><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>Now, did\u00a0I just write an entire blog today to\u00a0justify my\u00a0intention to go watch completely naked men dance on stage (yes<\/em>)\u00a0and maybe\u00a0grind their\u00a0hard, sweaty bodies against mine a little while I\u00a0tuck fivers in their palms?\u00a0(yes<\/em>) Did I lay down a whole line of bullpuckey about watching, listening and asking questions as an excuse to ogle some strange? (oh,<\/em> yes.)<\/em> Would I do that? (Yes. Yes I would.<\/em>) That’s borderline crapweasel of me. (Your point?)<\/em><\/p>\n

OK, that’s exactly what I did. <\/em>And you fell for it. I thought you knew me better than this. Brains? You thought I was writing about brains?<\/em> ME?<\/em> How could you have read all that without\u00a0noticing that my mind is so far into the gutter that it couldn’t see daylight if\u00a0I\u00a0climbed\u00a0to the top of the sludge pile\u00a0and jumped up and down?\u00a0<\/p>\n

Brains. Ha! Folks, I said “cock” and “strip club” in the very first sentence. Sillyheads.<\/p>\n

Right! Now that we’ve determined I’m a total degenerate, and kind of a jerk, where’s your favourite place to watch\/listen\/ask questions?\u00a0What are the worst questions you’ve ever had to ask? What are the best answers you’ve ever received?<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>(Editor’s note: AJ Aalto is a bipolar biologist, bookseller-bookworm, stalker-eavesdropper, peeper\/groper,\u00a0 unrepentant pervert, amateur writer and professional doofus. Fair warning: if she asks to “harvest” you, she might be talking about your intellect … orrrrr she might be talking about selling your organs on the black market to pay for\u00a0a Mini Cooper. )<\/em><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

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\u00a0 A writer’s greatest resource, in my opinion, is the\u00a0awesome\u00a0clout of human brain power–millions of furiously-blinking electric impulses zinging along nerves and neurons, dancing in a heady soup (heh, I said head) of hormones, fed precise doses of\u00a0cerebral chemicals of near-magical influence, apt to spill glory in a blink, surging with readiness like a cock […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-695","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-opinions"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/695"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=695"}],"version-history":[{"count":42,"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/695\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":742,"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/695\/revisions\/742"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=695"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=695"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=695"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}