{"id":2621,"date":"2013-06-27T08:45:21","date_gmt":"2013-06-27T13:45:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/?p=2621"},"modified":"2013-06-27T08:45:21","modified_gmt":"2013-06-27T13:45:21","slug":"why-i-do-not-write-romance","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/?p=2621","title":{"rendered":"Why I Do Not Write Romance"},"content":{"rendered":"

Today is my 15th wedding anniversary. It began a little something like this…<\/p>\n

Me: Got you a present.<\/p>\n

Viking: Is it a divorce?<\/p>\n

Me: You wish, blockhead.<\/p>\n

Viking: A man can dream.<\/p>\n

Me: Shut yer toasthole, I’m trying to be nice for a minute!<\/p>\n

Viking: I feel like I should take cover, or at least flinch?<\/p>\n

Me: Your gift is: I promise not to roll my eyes at you alllllllll day.<\/p>\n

Viking: Whereby “day” means “daylight” means “full sun”…and today, that’s quite the loophole, since it’s overcast.<\/p>\n

Me: That’s not what I meant. I meant “day” as in “full sun” as in “until dusk”.<\/p>\n

Viking: I stand corrected.<\/p>\n

Me: Think you know everything. Pffft.<\/p>\n

Viking: Why are your eyes all scrunched closed?<\/p>\n

Me: I’M TRYING NOT TO ROLL THEM AT YOU! THIS IS YOUR GIFT!<\/p>\n

Viking: *deadpan* I really hit the jackpot when I married you.<\/p>\n

Me: Yes, you did! Congratulations on your success!<\/p>\n

(And before Jason Jones says it for the hundredth time, yes, I understand that The Viking is the only man on the planet who would ever put up with a horrible creature like me for more than a day and a half. I KNOW THIS. So congratulations to me, too. Heh heh)<\/p>\n

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Today is my 15th wedding anniversary. It began a little something like this… Me: Got you a present. Viking: Is it a divorce? Me: You wish, blockhead. Viking: A man can dream. Me: Shut yer toasthole, I’m trying to be nice for a minute! Viking: I feel like I should take cover, or at least […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2621","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-opinions"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2621"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2621"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2621\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2630,"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2621\/revisions\/2630"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2621"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2621"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2621"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}