{"id":2485,"date":"2013-04-04T13:21:05","date_gmt":"2013-04-04T18:21:05","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/?p=2485"},"modified":"2013-04-04T13:21:05","modified_gmt":"2013-04-04T18:21:05","slug":"the-power-of-fortune-cookies","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/?p=2485","title":{"rendered":"The Power of Fortune Cookies"},"content":{"rendered":"

I was at dinner this past weekend at a lovely Chinese buffet with friends for the birthday of my sometime-collaborator, Jason D. Ready. \u00a0After dinner, each of the diners handed me their fortune cookie slips. I didn’t ask for them, mind you. It was understood.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

See, I have this quirk. It might even be creeping into superstition territory. Despite all logic to the contrary, I suspect that if I throw out a fortune from a fortune cookie…it won’t come true.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>As a result, I have ….um, a lot of them. \u00a0Some, I keep pegged in front of my face; I use them as inspiration to not<\/em> kill people, elevating me to new and amazing non-people-killing heights (although<\/em>\u00a0one day I wanna crack open a cookie and read, “go ahead, whack just one creep, you’re gonna die next week anyway.”<\/em>). Other slips, I keep in a drawer with a pack of Harry’s cigarettes (I don’t smoke, but he does<\/em>), half a Green & Black’s organic dark chocolate bar, and about a thousand-and-one paper clips.<\/strong><\/p>\n

I suspect I am not the only one who does this. Fess up, people. Do you read your fortune and then squirrel it into your pocket? Do you just toss it in the trash? Crumple it and leave it behind with your sweet&sour-stained napkins? Don’t you worry about your Fortune, your Luck, your FUTURE? You’re gonna toss your FUTURE in the TRASH? What does that say about your state of self-loathing. Or, alternatively, your blind trust in your ability to dodge bad luck? Go ahead, thumb your nose at the, uh, paper-slip prognostications of the powers that be! See what they predict for you next time…\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><Damn right, my patience will pay off. When you’re fairly sleep-deprived, nothing says promise like a 4 A.M. fortune cookie. >\u00a0<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

(ps. I have no idea how Silver Surfer got on my pegboard o’ death, but until he bothers me, he can stay. That’s pretty much my attitude toward most people\/things: stay ’til ya bother me *grin*.)\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

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I was at dinner this past weekend at a lovely Chinese buffet with friends for the birthday of my sometime-collaborator, Jason D. Ready. \u00a0After dinner, each of the diners handed me their fortune cookie slips. I didn’t ask for them, mind you. It was understood.\u00a0 See, I have this quirk. It might even be creeping […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2485","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-opinions"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2485"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2485"}],"version-history":[{"count":14,"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2485\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2502,"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2485\/revisions\/2502"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2485"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2485"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ajaalto.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2485"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}